July 20, 2008

Purge

It's now been over 24 hours since I've had a cigarette. Instead of lighting up when I feel the several occasions of light anxiety that occur during the course of my typical day, I'm spraying Dr. Bach's Rescue Remedy on my tongue. The true test will be when one of life's major anxieties shows up — and how I will chose to cope then. We shall see.
I've realized that quitting smoking is as much about letting go of negativity as it is actually putting down the smokes. This realization has got me wanting to dispose of so much mental baggage, which I try to do periodically. I can see around what issues I've let negativity creep back in and where some mental house-cleaning is in order.
Probably the most important thing I can do right now is to not just sit around and think about how to purge the negativity — surrounded by my journal, and copies of You Can Heal Your Life and Living the Life You Were Born to Live — but to actually do something physical. Like exercise. The thing I resist more than any other thing. Just Try. Run. Sweat. Struggle. Feel-Out-Of-Breath. Feel Awkward. Feel Weak. Feel Stronger. Believe That I Can.

2 comments:

veganmama said...

I didn't realize that smoking had become something you struggled with. Congrats on starting the journey -- I'm here if you need me. :)

Ms. Babble said...

I KNOW this is something you can do!! I never thought I could do quit, but I did! And it was really worth it...

...and that Dr. Bach stuff is actually really great. E told me about it and I just bought some of the drops a few days ago. Do whatever you gotta do to not smoke!